Conversations

To hear Joel read this to you, go to http://tinyurl.com/9rw69

I had occasion to overhear a conversation an acquaintance of mine had. His cellphone rang; it was his wife. He was brief to the point of curtness. "Nothing new. No, I'm fine. Oh, is she with you? Put her on." I knew he was referring to his young daughter.

His entire manner changed. His voice became almost musical. "How are you, dear? I miss you! What did you do today? Oh, really? I'm sure she didn't mean to hurt your feelings. And what else? Daddy loves you so much! Give me a kiss, now!"

Then he returned to his former depressed manner. "Yes, fine. I don't have time to talk to you now. Sure, I'll call later. Bye." I knew it was his wife again.

When he was done, I said, "Are you aware of how differently you talk to your wife and to your daughter? I'll bet your marriage would be transformed if you spoke to your wife the way you speak to your daughter."

He blushed, but didn't say anything.

Dear Hero, turn on your "mental tape recorder" next time you speak with your wife - especially on the phone. Then play back the conversation, and ask yourself: Is this the conversation of a Hero talking to his beloved Coach?

Or is it petulant? Dismissive? Annoyed?

You are creating your marriage, conversation by conversation, action by action. Give some thought to what you are doing. And make changes where necessary.

Love and blessings,
Joel

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